I don’t actually mind getting up in the middle of the night to change and feed Freddie. I don’t like it, per se, but I don’t mind it. He’s a baby. I go through the changings/feedings in enough of a fog that I can drop right back to sleep after I put him back in bed. It’s not enough sleep for me without stimulants, but it’s enough if I add plenty of coffee and a little bit of chocolate and at least one death-defying, adrenaline rush-inducing stunt by my older children each day (jumping from the top of a long, cement staircase at the Seattle Center on Sunday, for instance). The constant time crunch between kids, work, housework, school, and other daily tasks fills in the gaps of my day and keeps me from falling asleep at the stove or wherever.
He sleeps here.
But what I can’t handle is a baby who wakes once in the middle of the night and then wails for two or more hours regardless of location, amount of ibuprofen ingested, or boobs available for constant eating. I’ve taken to going downstairs and farting around on the internet until he can sooth himself back to sleep on my shoulder. Is it teeth? Is it itchy eczema? Is it just general contrariness? I don’t care. I just want it to stop. When I’m up that late at night for that long, I fully wake up and then I can’t get back to sleep easily. I was out of bed the night before last (mostly, save 20 minutes during which Tony tried, and failed, to calm Freddie down – kid wants mom ALL THE DAMN TIME) from 1 am until 3 am, but then I was still awake, lying there like an ass, until at least 3:30. I got up for the day at 6:30. Last night, Freddie woke up at 3:30 and went back to sleep at 4:30 and THANK GOD Tony was getting up for the day at that point because Freddie chilled out cried on his shoulder while he ate breakfast and I got to doze until he dumped the baby back in bed with me.
Uuuugh.
Cute at all hours.
My chocolate supply needs replenishing.
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